The “First Kiss” And The “Last Supper” Effect

Photo: Love’s Old Sweet Song by Linda Yvonne

This next technique in my Psychological Triggers series is a simple one. I like to call it the “first kiss” effect or the “last supper” effect, depending on the situation. I will explain this later in the post.

All I can say is we all have experienced both effects. The effects of these phenomenon are so powerful that if I perform an experiment on you, I can prove my point right now.

Now let me ask you…

Do you remember your first kiss? How about your sixth?

Do you remember your first girlfriend? How about your 5th? (If, you reached more than that number!)

Do you remember your first time stepping into a McDonald’s? How about your 3rd?

How about your first day in your first full time job?

My point being: People tend to remember their first experience with something but not the subsequent experiences except the last. Thus the cliche, “create a good first impression“. But that’s the tip of the iceberg.

Did you also know that people alter their thoughts and feelings on subsequent events to be consistent with that first experience?

Here’s an example of the “First Kiss” Effect

Let’s say you met a girl (or a guy) you really like in a bar one night. She seems fun and open. She’s aggressive… you know, sexually, and she’s awfully into you. The two of you chatted for a while in that bar, danced and the tension is building up. But for some reason, the night ended with her surrendering her phone number to you. (Yes, let’s assume THAT’S what happened)

You call her up three days later to set up another date. You met her again, this time in a coffee shop, early in the morning. She’s cold, not fun and not into you. The two of you talked for a while and discovered that she was partially drunk the other night.

Now, what would you think? Would you have connected the dots and said to yourself that it’s because she was partially drunk that she was into me? Or would you come up with another reason?

Here’s what most people would do.

They dismiss, subsconciously, that she being drunk has nothing to do with her interest in you. Or they justify. Here’s an example of justification:

Drunks always say the truth. What’s really in their mind. If she likes me when she’s drunk, that means she really like me.

Sounds familiar? People do this all the time.

Then instead of concluding that she’s really just a dull person who’s just not that into them, they justify why she’s dull on that day. Perhaps she’s having a bad day. Or she didn’t sleep well last night.

In other words, they alter their thoughts and feelings to be consistent with their first impression: She likes me.

Same goes for the “Last Supper” Effect

And just as we tend to remember the first impression, we also tend to remember the last impression. Sometimes, the “last supper” effect can even be more powerful than the “first kiss” effect.

Here’s an example: If someone has been treating you well, and then the two of you had a big arguement and separated ways since then, what would you think of that person?

You probably only remember the fact that he/she is a horrible person, just as people tend to remember only the last supper (why not last second?) Jesus had before he was hung onto a cross.

What has this got to do with you?

For one, you want to always put your best foot forward. Interestingly, this also applies to any list.

If you have not been using lists in your copy, you should start now. People love to lists because they are quick and easy to read.

The first and last items in your list, be it a benefits list or a P.S. list, are going to be the most remembered ones. Place your biggest benefit, or the main idea you want to put across right there.

In an interesting study performed by a researcher called Asch, showed this effect. What he did was first expose a group of students with a list of positive adjectives describing a person named “Jim”. He then exposed them to a list of negative adjectives about the same and asked them what sort of a person do they think Jim was.

Interestingly, the students found Jim to be a “likable” person, despite the list of negative adjectives.

So whatever you want your customer to remember about you, placing them first in a list is the best way to do that. There are a number of other studies that showed this effect so make full use of it.